The Grateful Life

Belly Buttons February 26, 2013

Filed under: Parenting,Stories — Nicole Welle Nere @ 10:23 am
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I was home alone with the boys over the weekend.  After bath time on Saturday night, Caelum and I were talking about belly buttons.  I explained how everyone has one, and it’s where we used to be connected to our mommies to get food.  He was enthralled.

He went to bed pretty well not long after that.  Tucked him in to his bed with Bruce, Chris’ old homemade Cabbage Patch doll.  Bruce is soft and loved, and his head turns 360 degrees, so he’s not always facing forward!  All was quiet in Caelum’s room for about 15 minutes, so I assumed he had fallen asleep pretty quickly.

All of a sudden I hear his door creak open slowly.  I look up, and Caelum is standing in the doorway peaking out, Bruce under his arm.

“Caelum, what’s going on?”

“Bruce doesn’t have a belly button!”  his terrified voice declared.  Oh my goodness, my heart just melted as I tried to hold back my chuckle.

I rushed over and knelt down next to him.  “Honey, it’s okay.  See, here’s Bruce’s belly button!”  All it took was a little turn of poor Bruce’s head so that he was facing the right direction again.  Poor Caelum had been lying in bed all that time, searching and agonizing over Bruce’s lack of belly button!

“Ooohhhh,” he said with a slight smile, and immediately he turned and headed back to bed.  All was okay again!  Love it!

 

Memory Crazy December 6, 2012

Filed under: Parenting,Stories — Nicole Welle Nere @ 1:01 pm
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Caelum and Daddy sat down to play Memory.  I was in the sun room nursing Everett and getting him ready for bed.  All of a sudden I heard Caelum start melting down in the bedroom:

“You’re not doing it right!  Daddy, stop!  You’re not doing it right!”

Chris attempted to calm him down and asked how exactly he was supposed to be doing it (because really, how wrong can you “do” the Memory game?), but Caelum was having none of it.  It was just beyond hope, in his tiny person’s opinion.

Caelum came out to me and asked me to play instead.  He waited patiently as I finished with Everett and got him to bed, then we sat down on the bedroom floor to play Memory.  I started laying out the cards in a little grid, and he was immediately satisfied.

“You’re doing it right!  That’s not how Daddy did it.”

Confused, because I wasn’t doing anything spectacular or out of the ordinary here, I told him he better get Daddy and show him how he preferred it be done.  So Chris came in and sat down to play with us.

After one successful round, Caelum wanted to play again, so Chris started laying out the cards.

“Look!” Caelum’s head whipped over to me with amazement on his face.  “He no acting crazy no more!!”

Upon further discussion, Chris admitted that perhaps yes, he had been acting a little crazy in his layout of Memory cards earlier.  He had put them in a circle of sorts on the floor, kind of a mishmash, and it was clearly the work of a certifiably crazy person (at least in a 3-year-old’s view).  I’m still laughing about Caelum’s gleeful reaction to his Daddy’s restored sanity.

 

No Time Out December 5, 2012

Filed under: Parenting — Nicole Welle Nere @ 12:01 pm
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Chris said last night as we were wrapping up dinner, “Caelum, I’m so proud of you.  You’re being such a good listener!”

“I being a good listener.  I no need go in time out.”

While we have been trying to cut down on the time outs and use more gentle discipline, at least we know there’s some motivation to avoid the time outs!

 

How We Treat Ourselves November 15, 2012

Filed under: Parenting — Nicole Welle Nere @ 5:16 pm
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Have been reading a new parenting site I recently found, ahaparenting.com.  It’s focus is on effective attachment parenting, which I love.  It lists the top ten reasons to use Positive Parenting, and #10 is “How you treat your child is how she will learn to treat herself.  That is some great truth, so simple, and yet easy to overlook.  Our children learn what they live.

In addition to this, I also happened to see a different post on a related angle:  that how you treat yourself is how your child will learn to treat herself.  It was from a mother that realized she needed to start seeing herself as beautiful, just as she sees her daughters as beautiful, and just as they see her now.  If they only see and hear their mother talking about her wrinkles or saggy butt or stretched stomach, they’re going to grow up thinking that is how women are:  never good enough, never beautiful once we pass the age of 22.

No woman wants her daughter to grow up thinking she’s ugly.  No woman wants her sons to grow up thinking only Barbie doll perfection is beautiful.  So why do we allow ourselves to think that way?  It starts with us.

This isn’t a problem of the big bad “they” that we blame everything on.  WE are “they,” and we have the power to change our own perceptions and our own attitudes.  It starts with us.